Once you have grounded yourself during an escalated situation, next engage in active listening with the person who is agitated. This can seem counterintuitive or difficult when you are dealing with somebody who is, for example, screaming at you, and it may feel like you’re rewarding them for being completely irrational. But it is key to getting them more centered and grounded so they’re less agitated and less likely to become a danger to themselves or others.

One of the main goals of active listening with an agitated person is reaching affirmation and accord. You are looking to try and find ways to agree with the person who is agitated. Even if you don’t entirely agree with the person, try to find at least a small way in which they may be right, or in which you can be on the same page, or team, with them.